The Things I Took for Granted

There are two things I'm very sure of after several months living in Seoul.  On one hand, I will cry when I leave this place.  I'll miss it SO much.  Next time you see me in the flesh...ask me what I miss the most about Seoul.  Whatever it is I tell you, I guarantee tears will be welling up in my eyes.

On the other hand, I'll definitely be ready to return home when the time comes.  I think most people say that when they've been in a foreign country for an extended period of time.  Yes--the place is amazing.  Yes--I'm never bored.  But sometimes, all I want is to be bored for a little while!

It takes a lot of energy to explore a strange place completely illiterate.  Especially when you can't even ask a friendly passer-by what a sign says, or which way something is.  And how many times have I caught myself praying to God that something just works?  "God--please just let this internet work.  God, please just let this converter work."  When stuff doesn't work--who are you going to ask to fix it?

Who wants to call their vice principal on a Saturday when their electricity got cut off...not because they didn't pay their bill...but because they paid it incorrectly?  It's easy to do when you can't read.  I probably mashed one wrong button on the ATM when I did it.

And poor Nicole...just now, she stopped by to tell me her hot water isn't working again!  It wasn't working the other day, so she told the secretary at school, Stella.  That night, a lady came by her apartment and fixed it.  Not two days later, it's running ice cold again.  She went down and told old Mr. Shin, the apartment manager.  He doesn't speak much English.  He came and pushed her hot water button for her, which she had of course already tried a million times, and just sort of indicated that the button was working.  She still has no hot water.

What a sigh of relief it will be when everyone around me speaks English...when I can just go buy my favorite peanut butter at the store...or read what's inside the medicine I'm taking when I'm sick.  It'll also be nice when it being 3pm doesn't mean it's 2am back home and I can actually call friends or family midday!  What a luxury that will be!

Have you ever gotten that sense of homesickness where you say to yourself, "OK.  This has been fun...but it's time to wake up out of this dream and rejoin reality once again--I miss it"?  Then you realize that this isn't just a fantasy...it is reality.  You are thousands of miles away from everyone and everything you've ever known, and you can't just click your heels and suddenly be able to hug your loved ones.  You can't just go to a restaurant for the first time and know exactly what it is you're ordering.  You can't tell a cab driver he's going the wrong way and ask him nicely to turn around.  You can't ask the lady in the grocery store if they have olive oil, and if so, where it would be.  You just have to look for it...and hope it has pictures on the package, since you are, in fact, illiterate.

How amazing it would be to be able to open up a phone book and see all the services available to me!  To be able to order delivery and give them my address and have them knock on my door with food!  To read food packages!  To ask for help and directions!  To read street signs and understand announcements!  To understand what they're saying on TV!  To....play Nintendo!

I had bought myself a Nintendo DSi a couple of weeks ago here in Seoul.  Upon starting it up, I found that the whole thing was in Korean with no English options.  And there was a lot of set-up I couldn't understand.  I decided I needed one in English, so my loving mother decided to mail me one.  I returned the other one and thankfully got my money back, even though it was difficult to explain to the salesman that I was trying to return it and why.  Yesterday I finally got my American one in the mail.  Since the plugs and voltages are different in different countries, Mom had even included a converter in my package.  I was so incredibly excited to get it!  I felt like I was 6 years old and it was Christmas Day...magical!  

But the converter didn't work.  I got to play my Nintendo just long enough to realize how much I loved it.  Then it died and I have absolutely no way of charging it.  I've tried everything.  I even took it to school, where the outlets are flat and it would fit better.  It lit up my DS for about 15 seconds before going out again.  It was like being a 6 year old on Christmas Day...and your present breaks.   When you get as excited as a 6 year old--you get as disappointed as one, too.  I cried pretty hard.  Life is tough.

Sometimes, you just wish you could snap your fingers and be in a place you're not.  Likewise, I'll be achingly sad to leave...knowing I won't be able to snap my fingers and come back.